Bigger Thomas's Problem With Mary and Jan

One of the biggest mysteries of the novel Native Son is the cause of Bigger's emotions around Mary and Jan. Of all the characters in the story Mary and Jan are the ones that try to be the least racist. However, their good intentions somehow lead to Mary's death. Even Bigger himself is perplexed by this, he knows that it was because of the way that Mary acted that made him kill her, but he cannot explain why.

Mary and Jan try the hardest of all the characters to not be racist, maybe even trying to hard. Jan insists on making sure that Bigger is not speaking in a way that would give Jan or Mary too much respect. When Bigger calls Jan "sir", Jan corrects him multiple times which is an odd and awkward moment. It seems clear that Bigger is not really comfortable with calling Jan much of anything except "sir". It's ironic that despite Jan trying to treat Bigger as an equal, he still orders him around. It is clear Jan is still treating Bigger differently than he would if Bigger was white.

Things get more complicated as Mary and Jan request that Bigger chooses a place for them to eat. Bigger is already uncomfortable since he was supposed to take Mary to her university class, but now they are insisting on eating at a place that Bigger would normally eat, which totally disregards any social norms around race. Mary and Jan are acting as if they are taking some tour of an exotic country, and are sampling the native cusine. They do not take time to realize that Bigger and other poor colored people are eating at this place out of choice, but because it is what they can afford, and what they are allowed to do. They are blind to the struggles that black people are facing, and even say later: "Yet they must live like we live. They're human. . . . There are twelve million of them." However, this still does not give a good answer to Bigger's own question, why are they treating him like this? 

The reason Mary and Jan are treating Bigger in this weird way may come down to one thing, they can. Mary and Jan, Mary especially, are both in positions where they can afford to act like this towards Bigger, or any other such person of color. Both are very wealthy compared to Bigger, both are white, and still young without responsibilities. They can both break the harsh social norms without any significant consequence. They can afford to be moral, but they are not aware of how privileged they are to be able to do this, and what it could mean to Bigger. 

I believe it is this fact that not only that Mary and Jan are purposefully breaking these racist social norms, but are also doing it just because they can that angers Bigger. It hurts his pride to be used as a tour guide of his own humble way of life, than to be treated normally. It is frustrating to him that they are not aware that he did not choose how he lives, and that it is a consequence of white racism.